I want to tell you a story why I became depressed and how the 2014 Minneapolis Bikers Month program helped me bounce back.
Ever since my best friend died, I have been so depressed. She and I were so close, and I thought, I knew everything about her. I knew she was going through a hard time with her mom, who was a perfectionist. She was always being bombarded to study hard and get into Harvard. One night, she just lost it. She called me after she downed a bottle of pills, but it was too late. My best friend said goodbye to me, and I think she gasped on her last breath while she was saying, “so long.”
This is not something that I would wish even on my frenemies. A best friend dying – committing suicide, that is – and you are so helpless during the whole ordeal, it’s nerve-wracking and shocking. At times, I get spaced out just by thinking about it. How can she do that? Was her life so hopeless for her that she felt to die was the only way out?
I cried for most days and every night for a month or so, until I received an email from her. No, it’s not from the grave – funny you. She programmed an email to be sent to me on a specific date, that if she is already gone. It was a letter full of love and asking for forgiveness. She asked forgiveness for having to leave so soon, and for leaving me all alone. Her reasons were crazy, but I understood her. She just told me one thing – to go out and live my life. One of the ways to “live my life,” according to her, was to have fun traveling locally.
She wanted me to join the bikers association which I did. She wanted me to take the bike tour, which I also did, and she was right. It made me happy. Biking helped me with my depression – the same misery that I suffered when she left this world.
I am at peace now, and I will continue to do this. Not just for her, but also for myself.